Loves Me Not

That was pirate-speak, did you get it? Hoh-hoh! Have you noticed? The news is very gay lately. I don’t understand how the AFA can even stand it!

First, put on your bullshit goggles, because this is kind of priceless:

Ugly Dress of the Week: Herpzilla Invades Korea

I found this weeks ugly dress while researching my Korean Wedding Customs post. I remember reading a while back that Paris Hilton had gone to Korea for god knows what, and now here’s the photo to prove it:

(Britney did it, too, and worse!)

   Now, I have no real problem with the dress itself. Hanbok dresses are quite lovely. It’s the Paris part, and the Pepto pink color, that qualifies this dress. You know what else? I don’t even know why celebs have to dress in traditional clothes when they visit foreign countries. I mean, it made sense for R&B singer Amerie to do it, since her mom is Korean (though there is no excuse for how ugly that dress was), but why do all these randos have to wear hanboks? If it were me, I’d feel super-weird, which is why I’m not gonna wear a wedding hanbok at my nups.

To help scrub the image of Herpzilla: International Skank of Mystery from your minds, here’s a gallery of Hanbok done right:

Culture Clash Wedding: Korean Customs

   Hey guys, sorry I’ve not posted in a bit, but the wedding planning appointments have been piling up on me like yuppies at a Baskin Robbins free scoop night. And my Alaskan adventurer bridesmaid is in town, so I’m trying to make time to hang before she leaves me to go puke on the tundras and sleep with eskimos and shit.

(Yeah, you thought I was kidding. Look at all these freeloading-ass fools lining up for their complementary frosty treats. You wanna be like these people. You want free foods. You’re gonna crash my wedding for the free foods.)

   So, without futher ado, the conclusion to my epic 3-part series about my random-ass, culturally-confused wedding:

Culture Clash Wedding: Western Customs

Last post we explored the weird world of Cajun wedding customs. Now it’s time to tackle the nuptual rituals we should all be familiar with: