Cake or Death: WTF? Interlude

This next post can best be summed up as: Things That Make You Go, “Hmmmm?”

   But please, don’t let my bad taste in 90s club music defer you from scrolling through my annotated gallery of crazy cakes I came across while researching my Cake or Death posts. The following cakes were not applicable to any of my CoD rants, but the’yre hardly rejects. No, in my book, the following cakes are ALL winners, and if I refrained from showing them to you, it’d make me a bad blogger. I think you need to see these cakes.  Your life will never be the same, trust.

   In writing classes (of which I need many, many more, thx), I remember being told that you have to start your story or whatever with a “hook.” Something to draw the reader in. Because the “hook” brings you back, I ain’t telling you no lie. The “hook” brings you back, on that you can rely. (ka-POW! It’s the one-two punch of bad 90s music up in here! I should be ashamed of myself, but I’m just not) Anyway, I you’ll agree that the first cake up on the carving station more than qualifies as a hooker (and on several levels, in fact!):

There are no words. Really, there aren’t. About the only observation I can make at this point is that the cake is shaved. (*retch*)

Cake or Death: Insanity Interlude

 

    Sooooo, while I was researching my fantasy confections for Cake or Death: Part II, I noticed some rather alarming trends in the baking world. Actually, it seems to have gone way beyond a trend, and is approaching a full-blown wedding institution. I really hope that this is just some instance where my chi is out of alignment and it’s throwing off my Google-fu or something.

Please to peep the newest, hottest, burgeoning trend that the internet has barfed up all over my consciousness after the jump.

 

Ugly Dress of the Week: From Bulgaria With Love

Now, being 25 years old and having lived through some of the ugliest decades in history, I thought I knew ugly. Z Cavariccis, scrunchies, new agey bullshit, goth, mall goth, mall bangs, Mormon compound hair, “the Rachel”, shit, I thought I’d seen it all. That was because I didn’t know

Bulgaria:

Ugly Dress of the Week

Making fun of Jordan AKA Katie Price is as easy as breathing. Or easy as seeing people’s naked bits at Mardi Gras. Or easy as starting a flamewar on the Consumerist. Or easy as schtupping 14-year-olds at a Fundamentalist Mormon compound. Whatever, the lack of effort it takes to rag on Jordan doesn’t make it any less fun. The above is a pretty hilarious comparison. May I also add: